


The Baddest Fig Newton

by FruitfulMind



Category: Borderlands, Tales from the Borderlands - Fandom
Genre: Crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-20
Updated: 2015-10-20
Packaged: 2018-04-27 05:07:50
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5035003
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FruitfulMind/pseuds/FruitfulMind
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Just an inside joke shared between my brother & I, sorry if it seems a little OOC.</p>
    </blockquote>





	The Baddest Fig Newton

**Author's Note:**

> Just an inside joke shared between my brother & I, sorry if it seems a little OOC.

Rhys's head was in the dirt, he was sobbing, quite dramatically; in fact, his hair loose in front of his face, tears raining down on the dry, broken ground.

“I'm...Vaughn, I'm...” He sobbed out, at a loss for words, choking on them in his throat with awful, ugly sobbing. “I'm such a...”

“ _I'm a bad fig newton_ ,” he whispered, sobbing once more. Vaughn squatted beside him, his hand on his shoulder.

“Bro, I know.” These words only caused Rhys to sob more, his shoulders rolling back with each tremendous sob.

“BRO!” Vaughn cried out, his hands now shaking Rhys out of this sob-fest. “BRO. I know, but...” He paused, looking into Rhys's eyes. “You're _my_ bad fig newton, bro.” He whispered, sharing a intense look at each other.

“Bro....” Rhys whispered, his soft eyes still glistening with tears.

\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I'm uh,” Rhys shifted uncomfortably, giving a glance at the con-woman, Fiona. “Yeah, I'm pretty sure that never happened.”

Fiona just gave him a look back, smirking a bit. “And who's to say it didn't.”

“She has a point.” The Stranger said, gun still pointed at Rhys's back.

“I DO! I would never say,” he took the chance to dramatically reenact the lie Fiona was saying, “ _I'm a bad fig newton, bro!_ ”

There was silence between the Stranger and Fiona, they shared a glance. “I'm uh... Pretty sure you just did.” Fiona wisely shot back, mimicking his voice from earlier, hand on her hip.

Rhys took a pause, chewing his lip a bit now. Shit. She got him there.

“....I hate you both. You know that?”

_Gun click._


End file.
